Tag Archive | myself

It’s Been A While

Letters To Myself📪 Letters To Myself ~

It’s been several months since I’ve done anything on my blog. Some of that is time, but most of it is from a lack of energy and desire. Depression is an annoying thing. And when you don’t have health insurance to see someone about it, it can be debilitating.

Thankfully I was able to take a free HealthCare.gov seminar at the county community center and I learned some things about the program. Last time I tried to get insurance through their site, I was told I qualify for the expanded Medicaid program. But I don’t really because we’re in a state that refuses to expand that program. Fricken Republican Bastards; and Bitches.

Thus people like me are meant to suffer and die to decrease the surplus population and make it easier for the greedy. Whatever. Another case of trying to do everything right and getting screwed over by the System. What are we supposed to do? Well….there’s an option. Continue reading

Letters – Teaching The Teacher?

Letters To Myself📪 Letters To Myself ~

Should you psychoanalyze the psychoanalyst?
Many people share a piece of their day online. That doesn’t mean they share the entire story. It doesn’t mean they share every detail of their knowledge. It simply means they needed a place to get something out of their system and that was the place they choose to let it out. Maybe to share a lesson they are learning with others.

When that ‘share’ is from a professional teacher, minister, a therapist and so on;  Should someone reading their post respond and give advice. Or try to teach the teacher?

Of course we all want to help those we feel connected to or care about. But when is that response beneficial, and when is it not?

Everyone is human and wants or needs to vent. When we hold professionals to a higher standard of that, we’re saying they’re not allowed to face challenges in life. If a Minister is walking their talk, they should always be happy, always have a perfect life, always be able to handle the challenges of life. Continue reading

Letters – A Little Movement

Letters To Myself📪 Letters To Myself ~

Well after a few weeks of seriously intense stress and angst in the house, things are finally moving forward. The cheap-skate brother-in-law finally paid My Man some of what he’s owed. That meant we could pay the electric bill and even get a few groceries.

Then we’re faced with a choice. Pay one of the back months mortgage payment or use a grand to start-up the business? We decided having the house isn’t going to do us any good, if we lose it anyway because there’s no money coming in. So we’re starting up his business. Continue reading

Letters – When Trying Isn’t Enough Anymore

Letters To Myself📪 Letters To Myself ~

I’m so tired of hearing “I’m trying”. Exactly when does trying not become enough? After 7 years of struggle and 2 weeks of not having any medication. Now if I were talking about pain medication, or medication that you need for making things better; I might say, made do with over the counter replacements.

But imagine your heart has problems with palpitations and keeping a stable rhythm. Imagine you’re a diabetic and medication keeps your sugar down. And then there’s the prescription that helps protect your kidneys from high sugar. Going two weeks and moving into week three is more than a little concerning. Continue reading

Letters – I Give Up

Letters To Myself📪 Letters To Myself ~

No matter what I say it seems to be the wrong thing. I can’t say something needs to get done, someone has a problem, or I need, want or should anything. As soon as I open my mouth and speak, I get a sigh, a huff, a nasty look, or angry answer.

I’m sorry I said anything. I’m sorry I’m a constant reminder of your inability to listen to me four years ago. I’m sorry whatever I say makes you feel like one more thing is on your shoulders.I didn’t ask you to do anything. I didn’t ask you to fix it. I didn’t expect you to do something. Continue reading

Letters – Must Be Nice

Letters To Myself📪 Letters To Myself ~

Once again it’s been quite a while since I’ve felt the need to write a letter to myself. It’s not that things have gotten better, the opposite has actually occurred. I keep fighting each day to keep a positive attitude and not worry. For the most part I’ve done that. Trying to take care of things the best I can with the little I have.

That’s not easy when you’ve been segregated from everyone and everything. My cell still hasn’t been paid so I’m cut off from a phone or text messaging. The house phone broke and we don’t have $20 to replace it with a cheep model, so that communication is out still out. Continue reading

Letters – Never Ending Cycle

Letters To Myself📪 Letters To Myself ~

It’s been quite a while since I’ve felt the need to write a letter to myself. It’s been a significantly tough weekend and that exploded today.

I tried all weekend to avoid getting into an argument. Which wasn’t easy since it seems everyone else was equally on edge and stressed out.

The promise of a great holiday season from the Man didn’t pan out. I regret to say I didn’t think it would. Not only has he not gotten paid in the past several months, he’s asked his Mom for more money that I know she doesn’t have. A place I never wanted to go to begin with. Continue reading